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How To Not Care What People Think

How To Not Care What People Say

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Do you find yourself being worried about what other people think about you? Or overly concerned about what others say about you? While it is natural for each of us to seek the approval of others, those who are self-confident and have a high self-esteem are able to discount the negative opinions of others and to remain assured of their own self worth.

To become less concerned with what people might be thinking, and less upset by negative things others may say...

  1. Never guess what others might be thinking.
  2. Value Yourself
  3. Live your own life
  4. Make your own choices.
  5. Value your own opinions.
  6. Choose to associate mostly with positive people who support you.

Never guess what others might be thinking.

Don't make assumptions.
- don Miguel Ruiz

Don't Take Anything Personally. Nothing others do is because of you.
- don Miguel Ruiz

Never attribute to malice that which is adequately explained by stupidity.
- Robert J. Hanlon

You cause yourself much unnecessary suffering when you waste your time and energy imagining that others may intend you harm. You truly have no idea what anyone else is thinking. Train yourself to avoid making any assumptions about what others may be thinking - and train yourself to avoid making any assumptions about why other people choose to do or to say something - or to not do or to not say anything.

The next time you are driving in congested traffic, become observant of the drivers around you. Watch as they tailgate, cut-in sharply, and perhaps gesture or yell at each other. Frustration, and the feeling of having no control over the situation, causes otherwise reasonable people to behave badly. But whatever they do or say is not personal. If someone urges you to drive too fast or follow too closely, it is about they, not about you.

While it is fairly easy to accept that the actions and speech of someone you have never met are not your responsibility, it is much harder to fully grasp that you are responsible for very little of what you spouse or your boss says or does. Mostly, what others say and do in your presence is a result of the frustrations they bring to the situations, rather that being an objective reaction to your actions.

Don't guess what others might be thinking, and especially don't shoulder blame for what they may be thinking.

Value Yourself

I don't care what people think or say about me, I know who I am.
- Jonathan Davis

No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.
- Eleanor Roosevelt

Stand Tall, Stand Proud.
Know that you are unique and magnificent.
You do not need the approval of others.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

You are important. You are the star - the only star - of your own life show. Everyone else is a bit player in the great drama of your life.

Live your own life

Always be a first-rate version of yourself, instead of a second-rate version of somebody else.
- Judy Garland

Most people are other people.
Their thoughts are someone else's opinions, their lives a mimicry.
- Oscar Wilde

Trust yourself, then you will know how to live.
- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

There is no way your life is "supposed" to be lived. There are no "authorities" appointed to judge the worthiness of your life. You have no responsibility to please anyone other than yourself. Be of service to humanity, but never be anyone's doormat.

Live your own life full out. Live boldly with vision, purpose, and commitment. Establish your own life purpose, and live your own life.

Make your own choices.

No one can give you better advice than yourself.
- Cicero

It is our choices ... that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities.
- J. K. Rowling (Harry Potter and The Chamber of Secrets)

I say NO to the demands of the world.
I say YES to the longings of my own heart.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Your plan for your life is the only plan that matters. Your parents and your family, perhaps your church and your friends, have plans for your life, but those people are mere spectators of your life - the life you get to life every day.

Value your own opinions.

To go against the dominant thinking of your friends,
of most of the people you see every day,
is perhaps the most difficult act of heroism you can perform.
- Theodore H. White

Don't be trapped by dogma - which is living with the results of other people's thinking.
Don't let the noise of others' opinions drown out your own inner voice.

- Steve Jobs

I don't know the key to success, but the key to failure is to try to please everyone.
- Bill Cosby

Value your own opinion more, and others' opinions less.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Why would you consider someone else's opinions, or wishes, to be more important than your own? In fact, why should anyone else's opinions carry any weight whatsoever in how you live your life. Make your life choices sincerely and deliberately. Then never second-guess your own values and choices simply because they may not be approved of by those around you.

Choose to associate mostly with positive people who support you.

Surround yourself with only people who are going to lift you higher.
- Oprah Winfrey

It is far better to be alone, than to be in bad company.
- George Washington

A friend is someone who knows all about you and loves you just the same.
- Elbert Hubbard

You can't completely avoid negative people - there are probably a few negative people in your extended family and where you work. However, you can make the choice to limit your exposure to negative people, and to cultivate friends and acquaintances who have a positive outlook on life, who share many of your essential values, and who value you as a person.



Thank you for reading my article How To Not Care What People Think.

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Jonathan Lockwood Huie
"The Philosopher of Happiness" - is the author of 100 Secrets for Living a Life You Love, co-author of Simply An Inspired Life, speaker, personal coach, and creator of the popular Daily Inspiration - Daily Quote free email and Regaining Your Happiness in Seven Weeks e-training program.



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